that was quite sudden. it caught me off guard and i didn't know how to react. all i know is that i didn't feel good. if you read Harry Potter, it is as if dementors have came and suck all my happiness away. sorrows and sadness just engulfed me. negative thoughts were racing through my mind. my heart dropped and no motivation to make it pump again. (haha..okay~ i exaggerated). but honestly, that fact changed my the joyful mood instantaneously. just snap your finger NOW, yarpz! this is how fast my feelings change.

the feeling is beyond description. not sure if you feel the same way before, it is a mixture of worry, sadness, excitement and some unknown feelings. they just came to me and swept me off my feet. i didn't want to think about it now.

i thought we have given it a thought before. it suddenly just makes me feel insecure. you sound that you have no faith; and making me feels as if you're giving up. that explains my worry. i am sad because we can no longer spend so much time like now. i guess we have to go through this phase but just a little longer than others. on the bright side, i'm quite excited though not sure over what. but i guess that makes us cherish the time together now and near-future even more. anyway, absence makes the heart grows fonder..hee (a bit off suddenly..hmm)

all i want to say is i want to believe in this. yes, believe in us. as i've said, it's not going to be easy but i guess we will if we want. have a little faith in...US!